Hurts…
That one stung. I wont lie. After a very successful Brisbane Trail Ultra campaign, my next race on the schedule was Shinetsu Five Mountains Trail 100miler in Japan. Along with a family holiday it was set to be a cool trip and our first time on a plane since Italy last year. Lets do it!
So, first of all, looking back, my lead up was pretty average. Not a lot of motivation, bailed on a few important workouts and felt pretty crap in some of my longer ones (Pine Creek). Something wasn’t right but denial is the best form of motivation?! All that being said and done, I still laid down a solid block but not as good as I would have like to have. We flew out to Japan after seeing one of my all time favorite bands (Terror) and the holiday kicked off.
Now, I might have been able to prevent this but the lead up to the race (9-10days) I struggled to find food to eat. It was actually REALLY hard! I literally spent the entire time feeling like absolute crap, with no energy and the heat didn’t help. It was HOT! Vegan food in Japan is pretty hard to find in places but I should have been eating double portions of the stuff I did have. Hindsight is good in the rear-view. It was a terrible lead up.
Then the race. Literally, just before it (and the seek prior) I didn’t know how I was going to get 10k done, but did my best to go in with a positive attitude and enjoy racing in Japan! What an opportunity! The race kicked off at 6:30pm and off we went. I will keep this short. The first 53k was terrible. I fell four times, wanted to sleep constantly and after about 4hrs my stomach went sideways. I just felt like garbage. Again. I got to that aid station after A LOT of time and laid on the grass for like 30min. I could have stayed there till Tegs collected me. I kept going though. Emotionally low, not wanting to be in the race and feeling terrible. Lame. Anyway, I kept going to 110k and then pulled up stumps. Stupid. However, this could be a turning point.
I have don’t a lot of pondering and reflecting after this DNF. Let me highlight a few points.
I do not want to be a quitter. I have done a bit of this lately. That ends with this race. I do not want to do this anymore. If I start something, or say I am going to do something I will. From training to racing. No more quitting.
I need to completely overhaul my nutrition. The liquid nutrition and the way I have been doing things the last couple of years is not working. I need to take everything back to basics. No more over-complicating things. Just get on with it. Water, food and electrolytes.
No more distractions. Less phone, no more podcasts/music when training etc. I need to work through my thoughts and self talk in training to be ready for races.
Race more (shorter ones too, not just long races)
Periodised training and proper (active) rest after a race.
Stop taking about what I’m doing and just do it.
I truly love running. Motivation comes and goes but riding it out and sticking at things is important.
Stop with the self sabotage. No more talking myself out of things, stopping feeding, doing things I know don’t lead to success.
I deeply regret stopping in the race. Deeply. I 100% did not need to but I did. I regret it even more than Noosa. I don’t want that feeling ever again, unless I have to go to hospital.
So. A new era. A re-creation and questioning of everything. Its time to get back to basics and remember the things I was doing before the flood of information in the crowded ultrarunning space. I know what to do. Stop mucking with a basic human instinct. To run. Heres to a strong, full time savage future. Consistency+Commitment.